by Br. Alexis Bugnolo
I want to give public praise to Our Lord Jesus Christ, Who is the source of all blessings and the cause of all graces. And who loves each of us more than we can imagine, as members of His adopted family, if we be Christians.
This truth was impressed upon me in a most tremendous way 4 years ago, and I was reminded of it today.
For 4 years ago, my mother, Addolorata (Doris) Josephine Cafeo had been so reduced by dementia to such a pitiful state, having lost all her reason, that seeing her extreme suffering, I prayed to the Lord Jesus, saying, “Lord, since she cannot merit any more, since she has lost her reason, there is no point in allowing her to suffer more. I will stay at her side as long as she needs, but if you want me to go to Rome to defend Pope Benedict XVI your vicar on Earth, then give me this sign. You take care of my mom and I will care for your Church. And that I might know that this is your will, I ask you to hear this prayer in the next 20 minutes.”
I returned to my mother’s bedroom, 20 minutes later, to find her taking her last breath, and she died in my arms. It was 4:30 A. M., on the Feast of All Souls.
I was and remained stunned by the Divine Intervention.
Yesterday, on November 2, after 4 years, the rose bush in her front yard, which never bloomed all year, bloomed. She loved roses and was always caring for them so that they produce the most flowers.
This too was a sign, that she is in Good Hands, and that I should not worry about her.
Praise be Jesus Christ!
(In our family we do not presume our loved ones go to Heaven. And thus, we had 90 masses said for the repose of my mom’s soul, nevertheless. Remember to have masses said for your loved ones. You most likely will be the last ones who remember them.)
Praise be Jesus Christ, indeed!! Thank you for sharing…this is so very touching and edifying. What a gift He gave you in His response to your prayer. Blessed be God forever!!
Thank you for this beautiful post.
I’m speechless…the love you have for your mother still so fresh and vibrant after years…and yes, rose bushes can send signs..ie..outside Assumption Church in Nashville in the early 2000s a type ofrosebush named after DonJuan of Austia bore only red Rose’s for over 40 years. The Church had been set for closing when the LatinMass of 2007 was reinstated and this Church was chosen to host it…, and one day one white rose bloomed.on the bush. It’s never happened again…but the dilapidated Church set to be demolished is now totally refurbished. and has the honor of being a fully rehabilitated parish and the TLM flourishing there…..RIP..Mrs Cafeo.
Now you’ve done it…Gone and made me cry. Thank God for Divine Intervention with your beloved Mother, as well as the Miracle of the Rose Bush manifesting as a blessing and message for your pleasure. So phenomenal to hear about small, personal experiences indicating God’s activity within our mortal lives allowing us to KNOW he’s there and that our loved ones are now in the realm of His Divinity for all Eternity. 🙏🏻😇🙏🏻 With such a difficult and challenging year, imagine it’s a welcome message of blessing. Your life and choices appear to have been🎯and your soul remains 🔥for our Lord. Thank-you so much for sharing this.
Beautiful. Inspirational. Moving. Powerful. Profound.
“But without Faith it is impossible to please GOD. For he that cometh to GOD must believe that He is; and is a rewarder to them that seek Him.” {Hebrews 11: 6, Douay version]
DEO gratias.
Very moving recount, Fra Alexis. May she have eternal repose. You are very important for the ‘re-turn’ of Pope Benedict, whichever way. The roses, which I also love, keep blooming after summer has gone. Saint Therese ..does send her answers through the ‘roses’ we are lucky to see around us.
What a tremendous blessing. What an affirmation of your crusade to defend and vindicate Benedict XVI, the Vicar of Christ!
I always recommend to others the 30 Gregorian Masses, with its ancient promise. When my mother and my husband died, I sent the stipend for the “Aid to the Church in Need” where there is no waiting, and a poor missionary in Africa or South America needs the financial support and is happy to say the Gregorian Masses for a beloved, departed soul.
I also encourage Priests to learn about, and for laity to request, the “Apostolic Pardon” at a deathbed.
The Church has so many treasures of Grace we do not educate ourselves to ask for!
Thanks for sharing this again.
But why you don’t you believe she went to heaven?
When our father died, our mother said: thank God (because he
suffered tremendously physically and otherwise) He told her:
‘why me? there is so much I still want to do.
Somewhat later she said: ‘if he is not in Heaven, then I don’t know it anymore. Yet her pain of not having him around any more was soulpiercing.
The things of eternity are not understood by us except through signs, and even when there are signs that a loved one has made it to paradise, we should not neglect having prayers said for them, lest we forget that they too want us to pray for them and those they loved who have been forgotten. So it is an ancient teaching of the Saints, that if a loved one is already in heaven, and you pray for them, offer some sacrifice or charity, or have a mass said for them, this makes them extremely happy because they then can use the merit to help a poor soul in purgatory who has asked them for help.
Too bad we are not taught the 4 Eternal Realities, and Economy of Souls even during our childhood and early manhood ( Elementary, High School, College ) .
It must be the Blessed Mother’s intercession when I was supposedly be dead after being hit by a van and woken up by Jesus’ voice to allow me to do penance 10 years ago. This made me search for The Truth.
This reminds me of a couple, longtime befriended with our parents and teachers like our father.
Shortly after the (horrible) death of our mother, late november ’11, as I found out in january ’12 when their phone was disconnected, the couple got a visit in their lifelong house (for him) from their MD.
He was rude with them and told him: I arranged a spot for you
in a nursing home, because here it is not feasible any longer.
Mr B. reacted more or less like this: well, let it be.
One hour later he died.
His wife, not finding him anymore died the next decemberday.
When I found out what had happened to them from a close friend of theirs I thought: probably our mother, their dear friend of over 50 years had invited them to come and see her:
it is really nice over here! ……………………………………………………….
…………………………………………………………………………………………………………..
…………………………………………………………………………………………………………..
And watching the picture of your mothers rose: the rose is not red, but pinkish………… (if I do see it right)
Praise be Jesus Christ! What a great blessing!
Thanks for sharing.
This post fills my heart. Brother Alexis. What I beautiful story, and I relate to it well. I cared for my mother throughout her years with dementia, too, and so well understand your prayer.
After many years, my mother’s decline was such that it was getting beyond my ability to continue to care for her. She reached a point where she no longer remembered who I was, but I knew who she was, and I was tormented that she was soon to go to a nursing home for “five days of respite care”. I was in caregiver burnout, and she needed help I couldn’t give her anymore. I agonized that I could see no way she would be able to return home at the end of five days. I remembered her having always expressed that she never wanted to go to a nursing home, and I had prayed for so long that she would die in her own bed in her own home. (I had even mentally “seen” years before that I would find her early one morning in her bed, having passed away. Which was odd, because she always slept very late, and so did I.) But it seemed that was not to be.
Two days before she was scheduled to go to for “respite care,” I lay beside her as she slept and told her how very sorry I was that I could no longer give her the care she needed, but that I would visit her every day, and be sure she had all she needed. And I added, “But if you want to go home to God, Mom, it’s OK. You can go and I’ll be OK.” (God forgive me, I was lying through my teeth– I knew I’d never really be “OK” again without her.)
I considered sleeping in the chair beside her bed that night, but changed my mind for reasons unknown. Early the next morning, I woke up and something told me to check on her. I saw that she had not moved, and when I approached, I realized she was gone. Both she and God had heard me, and in His mercy, He had taken her home. Mercy for her, and mercy for me, even though I felt like my heart was pulverized.
She loved birds and lighthouses. Birds have ever since given signs to me. I always thought my mother’s hands fluttered like the wings of birds. And dementia had made her thoughts flutter like hummingbird wings behind her eyes, and she always remained as delightful as a hummingbird. She was never angry, always sweet and smiling.
She died 12 years ago. God could not have blessed me with a better mother, and I still thank Him every day. You clearly know just what I mean.
Thanks for sharing this grace. We offer many prayers in life, and do not realize how much that God is listening. He wants us all to get to Heaven to be with Him in His house, and they prayers directed to that end, are always answered.
A red rose is also a sign of martyrdom so it might be a sign for you Brother.
My mom planted this red rose bush, since it was her favorite. I told her, in that dry spot on the hill, it would never bloom, and it does not, except twice, now, for the anniversary of her death.
THANK YOU!
I will pray for her departed soul too.
What a powerful testimony about God’s Grace and the miracles He continues to grant. My 6 month old daughter is named Josephine Rose Craigie. Inspired by Joseph and Mary and the profound impact they have had in my life and conversion. Thank you for sharing and inspiring us all. May Addolorata (Doris) Josephine Cafeo, rest in eternal Peace. <3
Such a touching story!
Thank you for sharing with us.
God Bless
When my mother died my daughter living in another state was on her outside deck and a hummingbird flew in front of her face, lingered a few seconds and flew away. She said she somehow knew it was a sign her grandmother had just died..and she was right.
The creatures of God are sometimes sent on angelic like missions. And thus, I totally agree about such signs.